Navigating Conversations with Grandma About My Son's ADHD: 3 Key Insights for Effective Communication
- Dr. Ashley Houchin
- Jun 24
- 3 min read
As a parent navigating the complexities of my son's ADHD, I often find myself reflecting on how to communicate these challenges to my mother. The role of grandparents has changed in today’s world. Many are stepping in to provide support more than ever before. However, this shift brings the challenge of discussing differing views on child-rearing practices, especially when managing hyperactive behavior. Here are three practical suggestions I’ve found effective in fostering communication with my mom about my son's ADHD.
Understand Her Perspective
Before diving into serious discussions, it’s essential to recognize Grandma's experiences and values. She grew up when parenting philosophies were different, which heavily influences her views on child behavior. Asking her about her experiences raising me allows her to share her wisdom. For example, she might explain a discipline method she used that seemed effective. This approach opens a doorway for understanding and makes her feel included in my parenting journey.
By acknowledging her past experiences while gently introducing new concepts, I create a more productive environment for discussion. When she expresses concerns about my son's hyperactivity, I validate her feelings. I might say, “I understand where you’re coming from. Many parents today are finding that ADHD is often managed best with acceptance and support along with traditional discipline methods.” By combining both views, we move toward shared understanding rather than opposition.
Share Information Gently
In conversations with Grandma, I've learned to share modern parenting strategies and research in a gentle, approachable way. Instead of overwhelming her with medical jargon or technical studies, I focus on relatable stories and practical examples. For instance, when I read about how daily routines can improve focus for children with ADHD, I share it in a casual manner. I might say, "I found this interesting article on how kids with ADHD can really benefit from structured routines. It’s helped us a lot."
Another time, I could suggest, “Did you know that simple activities like yoga have been shown to reduce hyperactivity in children by up to 30%?” Such gentle prompts encourage her to engage with fresh ideas instead of feeling defensive about her own experiences. This way, she feels invited into the conversation rather than told she is wrong.
Emphasize Teamwork
The positive approach that has made our conversations smoother is emphasizing that we are on the same team. I frequently remind Grandma that our goal is the same: what’s best for my son. Her insights and experiences are invaluable to our family’s journey. By positioning our dialogue as a collaborative effort, I reinforce that we are allies in helping him thrive.
I suggest specific ways she can support us, such as creating a calming space during her visits or using strategies that worked for her in the past. One suggestion might be, “Could you help him with reading during your visits? I remember how much you enjoyed that with me.” This collaborative spirit helps bridge the generational gap, ensuring Grandma feels empowered and valued.
Final Thoughts
Communicating about my son’s ADHD with his grandma can be sensitive. By understanding her perspective, sharing information gently, and emphasizing teamwork, I’ve turned these conversations into opportunities for growth and connection. Parenting continues to evolve, and these strategies help align our approaches while strengthening family bonds. With patience, empathy, and effective communication, I believe we can navigate the complexities of ADHD together, creating a supportive environment for my son to thrive.
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